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Consequences

What happens after a child breaks a rule: letting natural results happen, a related consequence, taking away a privilege, an unrelated punishment, or solving the problem together.

What consequences should we use when our child misbehaves?

In short: Parents choose between 5 main approaches: Natural consequences only; Logical, related consequences; Removing privileges (AAP, APA); Unrelated punishments; None, solve the problem together (Greene, Kohn). Evidence: experts disagree. Credible bodies or researchers disagree — decide whose guidance you'll weigh. Best settled: toddler.

Evidence
Experts disagree
Best settled
Toddler
Part of
Raising the child

Consequences: what are the options?

Parents usually land on one of these 5 approaches.

  1. 1. Natural consequences only

    You let the result of the action teach the lesson, such as being cold without a coat.

  2. 2. Logical, related consequences

    You choose a consequence connected to what happened, such as cleaning up a spill.

  3. 3. Removing privileges (AAP, APA)

    You take away something valued, such as screen time.

  4. 4. Unrelated punishments

    You give a punishment that has nothing to do with what the child did.

  5. 5. None, solve the problem together (Greene, Kohn)

    You skip consequences and work out a solution with the child.

Consequences: what does the evidence say?

Experts disagree. Credible bodies or researchers disagree — decide whose guidance you'll weigh.

APA lists reasoning, time-out, privilege removal and ignoring as better than physical discipline

Sources

What else is worth knowing?

A consequence is what follows a behavior. Natural ones happen without you; logical ones are chosen by you and connected to what happened; punishments are unconnected. Some approaches skip consequences and focus on solving the problem with the child.

Questions to ask each other

  • What kind of consequence do you think teaches best?
  • Where do we draw the line between a consequence and a punishment?
  • How will we make sure the consequence fits the behavior?

More in Discipline and behavior

First published 2026-10-03. Last updated 2026-10-05. General information, not medical advice.