Preparing together
Whether you will get ready for parenthood as a couple, from nothing formal to books, a class, or counseling, and what that preparation looks like.
How should we prepare for a baby together?
In short: Parents choose between 4 main approaches: Nothing formal; Books and question lists; A workshop or couples group; Counseling. Evidence: evidence leans one way. Research or guidance points in a direction, but it's thin, small or correlational. Best settled: during pregnancy.
- Evidence
- Evidence leans one way
- Best settled
- During pregnancy
- Part of
- How we work as a team
Preparing together: what are the options?
Parents usually land on one of these 4 approaches.
1. Nothing formal
You do not do any formal preparation as a couple.
2. Books and question lists
You read books or work through lists of questions together.
3. A workshop or couples group
You take a class or join a group for expecting couples.
4. Counseling
You see a counselor together before or after the baby arrives.
Preparing together: what does the evidence say?
Evidence leans one way. Research or guidance points in a direction, but it's thin, small or correlational.
Structured programs show benefits in small trials
Sources
What else is worth knowing?
Having a baby changes a relationship, and couples who prepare together tend to handle the change better. Preparation can be as light as reading the same book or as structured as a class or counseling. The point is to do some of the thinking before you are exhausted.
Questions to ask each other
- What would make us feel more ready: a class, a book, talking to other parents, counseling?
- What is one question about becoming parents we have not yet asked each other?
- How would we know if we needed more support before or after the baby?
More in How we decide together
First published 2026-10-03. Last updated 2026-10-05. General information, not medical advice.