Money, chores and responsibility: 12 decisions to make together
Allowance, chores, college funds and how much to spend on kids.
1. Baby budget and income drop
Planning for the cost of a baby and for any drop in income if one of you takes leave or cuts back.
3 options · Your call · During pregnancy
2. Education savings
Whether and how you save for your child's education.
4 options · Your call · 0–6 months
3. Allowance model
Whether your child gets regular pocket money and on what terms: none, a set amount unconditionally, pay tied to chores, or a mix where basic chores are unpaid and extra jobs earn money.
5 options · Experts disagree · School age
4. The child's money: structure and tools
How your child learns to handle money: free spending, save-spend-give jars, a parent-matched savings plan, or a real bank account.
7 options · Your call · School age
5. Money transparency
How much your child learns about family money: nothing, general values and trade-offs, the budget, or income and net worth.
4 options · Your call · School age
6. Spending on the child and materialism
How much you spend on your child and what that teaches, from a minimalist approach and experiences over things to matching what their peers have.
4 options · Evidence leans one way · Toddler
7. Birthdays and gifts
How big birthday celebrations and gifts are: family only, a few friends, the whole class or a venue, and whether you ask for no gifts.
8 options · Your call · Toddler
8. Chore philosophy
Whether children do household jobs and why: childhood is for play and school, self-care only, unpaid contribution to the family, paid work, or working alongside adults from toddlerhood.
5 options · Evidence leans one way · Toddler
9. Chore start age and enforcement
At what age chores begin and how firmly you hold to them: from age two or three to the teens, and with routines and reminders or by invitation only.
7 options · Your call · Toddler
10. Self-care skills timeline
When you expect your child to do things for themselves, like dressing, feeding and washing, and whether you push early independence or follow readiness.
3 options · Evidence leans one way · Preschool
11. Who pays for big items (phone, car, university)
Who pays for large costs as your child grows: parents pay, a set contribution, matching, or the child pays.
4 options · Your call · Teen
12. Investing lessons and inheritance
When you teach your child about investing and how you plan to leave money: nothing until adulthood, concepts only, a small real account, helping during life, or a limited inheritance.
6 options · Your call · Teen