Open the app

Screens, phones and digital life: 18 decisions to make together

Screen time, first phone, social media, games, AI — and what you post about your child.

  1. 1. Posting the child's photos

    Whether you share photos or videos of your child online and with whom, from nothing identifiable to a private album to open posting.

    5 options · Your call · During pregnancy

  2. 2. Parents' own phone use

    How you use your own phones around your child: phone-free time with them, set zones and times, or no particular rules.

    4 options · Evidence leans one way · Around the birth

  3. 3. Screens before age 2

    Whether babies and toddlers under two see screens at all, such as video calls only, occasional shared viewing, or screens as part of the day.

    4 options · Evidence leans one way · 0–6 months

  4. 4. Daily limits, ages 2-5

    How you limit screens for preschoolers: a fixed time cap, a soft cap with quality rules, or no clock and judging by the AAP's five questions (Child, Content, Calm, Crowding Out, Communication).

    4 options · Experts disagree · Toddler

  5. 5. How limits are set, ages 6-12

    How you set screen rules for school-age children: fixed minutes, weekday and weekend rules, rules about content and context, or letting the child regulate.

    4 options · Your call · School age

  6. 6. Content, co-viewing and background TV

    What your child watches and whether you watch with them, including whether the TV is on in the background.

    5 options · Your call · Toddler

  7. 7. Screens as a tool (meals, cars, restaurants, meltdowns)

    Whether you use screens to get through hard moments, such as meals out, car trips or meltdowns.

    4 options · Your call · Toddler

  8. 8. Personal tablet, YouTube and short video

    Whether your child has their own tablet and what they watch, from none to a shared locked-down tablet to their own device.

    4 options · Your call · Toddler

  9. 9. Video games: time, violence, online chat

    Which games, how long, and whether your child can play and chat online with others.

    6 options · Experts disagree · School age

  10. 10. Parental controls and a family media plan

    Whether you use control software and a written plan, light controls with conversation, or rely on trust and talking.

    3 options · Your call · School age

  11. 11. First device and first smartphone

    When your child gets their first phone and what kind, from a smartwatch or basic phone to a full smartphone.

    4 options · Experts disagree · Tween

  12. 12. Social media start age

    The age at which your child may have social media accounts, from the platform minimum of 13 to later at 15, 16 or 18.

    5 options · Guidance changing · Tween

  13. 13. Acting alone or with other parents

    Whether you set phone and social media rules on your own or agree on them with other parents, a pledge or the school.

    4 options · Your call · School age

  14. 14. Phones in bedrooms and at school

    Whether phones stay out of bedrooms overnight and how phones are handled during the school day.

    5 options · Evidence leans one way · Tween

  15. 15. Monitoring messages and location

    Whether and how you check your child's messages or track their location, with their knowledge or not.

    7 options · Your call · Tween

  16. 16. AI companions and chatbots

    Whether your child may use AI chatbots and companion apps, from none before 18 to supervised general assistants to open use.

    4 options · New territory · School age

  17. 17. AI for schoolwork

    Whether and how your child may use AI for homework, from not allowed to research help only to following the teacher's policy.

    4 options · Your call · Tween

  18. 18. Online safety, sexting and pornography

    How you talk to and protect your child about risks online, including sexting and pornography: blocking, conversation, or both.

    4 options · Your call · Tween