# Video games: time, violence, online chat

**What are our rules for video games?**

Which games, how long, and whether your child can play and chat online with others.

In short: Parents choose between 6 main approaches: No games; Weekend-only or capped; Balanced with obligations; No limits; offline only; Friends only; Open play. Evidence: experts disagree. Credible bodies or researchers disagree — decide whose guidance you'll weigh. Best settled: school age.

- Area: Screens, phones and digital life
- Evidence: Experts disagree
- Best settled: School age
- First published: 2026-10-03
- Last updated: 2026-10-05
- Page: https://www.raisingyourchild.com/topics/screens-phones-and-digital-life--video-games-time-violence-online-chat

## Video games: time, violence, online chat: what are the options?

1. **No games**: The child does not play video games.
2. **Weekend-only or capped**: The child plays only on weekends or up to a set time.
3. **Balanced with obligations**: The child plays once homework and other duties are done.
4. **No limits; offline only**: The child plays as much as they like, but never connected to other players.
5. **Friends only**: The child plays online only with people they know in real life.
6. **Open play**: The child plays online with anyone.

## Video games: time, violence, online chat: what does the evidence say?

**Experts disagree.** Credible bodies or researchers disagree — decide whose guidance you'll weigh. (Contested (small effects))

APA: a small link between violent games and minor aggression, none established to violence; others dispute even that

Sources:

- [APA](https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2020/03/violent-video-games-behavior)
- [Ferguson et al.](https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1745691620927666)

## What else is worth knowing?

Games vary widely, from puzzles to shooters, and many let players talk to strangers. The decisions are how much time, what content, and who the child can talk to. Age ratings give a starting point.

## Questions to ask each other

- Which games are fine, and which are not?
- Who may our child play with online?
- How will we know if gaming is crowding out other things?

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General information, not medical advice. Two parents can each answer this and compare: https://www.raisingyourchild.com/explore?cat=screens-phones-and-digital-life&topic=screens-phones-and-digital-life--video-games-time-violence-online-chat