# Toilet-training motivation and setbacks

**Should we use rewards for potty training, and what about setbacks?**

How you encourage potty training and respond when it goes wrong: whether you use praise, stickers or treats, and what you do about accidents, refusal and steps backward. Setbacks are a normal part of the process.

In short: Parents choose between 5 main approaches: No rewards; Praise only (CPS); Sticker charts; Treats; pause for 1-3 months; Push through. Evidence: well established. Guidance and evidence agree. The real question is whether you'll follow it. Best settled: toddler.

- Area: Health, body and toileting
- Evidence: Well established
- Best settled: Toddler
- First published: 2026-10-03
- Last updated: 2026-10-05
- Page: https://www.raisingyourchild.com/topics/health-body-and-toileting--toilet-training-motivation-and-setbacks

## Toilet-training motivation and setbacks: what are the options?

1. **No rewards**: You do not reward toilet use.
2. **Praise only (CPS)**: You praise but give no prizes.
3. **Sticker charts**: The child earns stickers for using the toilet.
4. **Treats; pause for 1-3 months**: The child earns small treats; and if it is not working you stop for a few months.
5. **Push through**: You keep going despite setbacks.

## Toilet-training motivation and setbacks: what does the evidence say?

**Well established.** Guidance and evidence agree. The real question is whether you'll follow it. (Settled against coercion)

Pediatric bodies discourage pressure and punishment. The Canadian Paediatric Society says rewards are not necessary and praise is enough, and that if a child refuses you should stop for 1 to 3 months. In one study 22% of children refused to poo in the toilet for a month or more; it is linked to constipation and usually resolves without treatment

Sources:

- [CPS](https://caringforkids.cps.ca/handouts/behavior-and-development/toilet_learning)
- [AAFP](https://www.aafp.org/afp/2008/1101/p1059)

## What else is worth knowing?

Accidents are expected and are not a sign of failure. The Canadian Paediatric Society advises staying calm, never punishing, and taking a break of 1 to 3 months if a child refuses. Some children will pee in the potty but hold their poo or ask for a diaper to poo in; that is common, is often tied to constipation, and letting them use a diaper for now is the usual advice. See a doctor if your child is not using the toilet by 4, slips back after six months of doing well, is holding in poo, or has pain or blood.

## Questions to ask each other

- Would we use rewards, and if so what kind?
- How will we react to accidents?
- When would we stop and try again later?

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General information, not medical advice. Two parents can each answer this and compare: https://www.raisingyourchild.com/explore?cat=health-body-and-toileting&topic=health-body-and-toileting--toilet-training-motivation-and-setbacks